Dating can be fun or dating can be awkward, it all depends on how you do it. I’m a big fan of dating because you get to know what you like, what works well with you, and what is important to you. Here are a list of the first five dates I think everyone should go on.
Date#1 The Meet and Greet Date
Date #1 is all about getting to know each other. Some people think you should go big right from the beginning. I’ve been on those first dates where I walked the blindfolded woman to the secret waterfall or took a midnight hike under a full moon to the best place to see the stars, and honestly, they were wasted moments. Yes, it was a great time but later when we actually sat down and got to know each other, we realized we weren’t even a good match. I know the woman wants to be “wow-ed” and the man needs to impress, but there will be plenty of time for that later. Truthfully, on date #1 you aren’t even sure if you like them yet. From what you’ve seen they seem like a good person or you think they’re attractive so you’ve gathered the courage to give it a shot. Unless you’re dating someone who you’ve known for a while, date one should be relaxed and low key. Have coffee or grab lunch, it doesn’t matter all that much. The focus here is to communicate, ask questions, and figure out if the things you like about the person are worth advancing your relationship with them. I can go out and have fun with just about anybody, but actually sitting down and developing a relationship with someone is much more challenging which is why it should be the first thing you do.
Note To Princesses: Just because you got asked to coffee doesn’t mean they are trying to put a ring on your finger. Calm down, say yes, and keep the misconceptions not based on reality to a minimum.
Date #2 The Traditional Date
This is everyone’s idea of a date, food followed by activity. This is where you get your dinner and mini-golf combo or maybe even lunch and afternoon bike ride through the park. This can be used for date #1, but because this is the “traditional date,” it often comes off strong if the other person is unsure about you. Either way, on this date you want to stay away from movies, concerts, or anything theater because you aren’t really building relationship or getting to know each other in that setting. I freaking love going to the movies, but there will be plenty of time for that later after I’ve learned whether or not this is something I want to pursue.
This is an extension of date #1 where you pick up where you left off. There is a little more interest than before and you have had a chance to process the things you learned and ask additional questions if needed. This is the date where you are really discovering whether you’re a good match and if not, that’s okay. Gather yourself and move on.
Danger: You should never be cycling through this list with multiple people at the same time. That makes you a tool. Women don’t like tools.
Date #3 The Sweep Date
This is it. This is your big chance. This is where you pull out the big guns and give it everything you’ve got. If you have made it to date #3 it is because there is a mutual interest or you haven’t royally screwed up at this point. Now is the chance to show the other what you are made of and try to sweep them off their feet. This is always the most exciting date, but its also the most nerve racking. No one ever knows what to do and nobody wants to mess it up. This is the date you will still be talking about in 40 years, so no pressure. Truthfully, your date activity really depends on who you are dating. Some women like a night to get dressed up, have a classy dinner, followed by a show or dancing, a long walk through downtown into the late hours of the night and ending up ruining their dress in the fountain because you decided you wanted to go for a swim. Other women like a day of adventure filled with kayaks, waterfalls, picnics, learning how to fish and maybe even a spontaneous mud fight. What you do is really going to depend on how well you were paying attention on dates 1&2. But whatever it is, take some time to put it together and think it through. Bring it because at this point she is worth it. You can sweep her if you’re using the right broom.
Did you know: If you are an active dater, the majority of the people you date won’t get this far.
Date #4 The No Make-Up Date
You’ve shown that you can have a great time out on the town or out on an adventure, but can you have a great time in everyday life? This is my favorite date. I typically ask the woman to not pretty themselves up for this and I do the same, well not pretty but you know what I mean. Make-up isn’t really the important thing, the key here is getting a taste for what a relationship would be like on a daily basis. This is nothing high-level, fancy, or out of the ordinary. This is where you have them come over after a long day of work for a homemade dinner and some snuggling on the couch. The goal at this point isn’t to impress, the goal is to be naturally yourself and secure with the other person…so secure, that you don’t even need makeup.
Date #5 Touchdown or Turnover
It’s time. This is date five. This is the high stakes medal round. This may have taken a couple months to go through, or maybe even a couple of weeks, but now is the time to determine where you are going to take this new relationship. Nobody wants to be led on in a relationship that’s headed for a cliff and nobody wants to wait around while you figure yourself out. This is where you get it together and either commit to the relationship or learn from your experiences and move on. Good luck.
Repeat steps 1-5 as needed.
About the Author
My name is Brett. I enjoy challenging status quo, being controversial, going through the buffet line and reading “terms and conditions” policies. Let’s be friends.